Tuesday, July 07, 2009

WORDS are powerful. It can change someone’s mind-cause psychological damage- change your life. Find out why:

By Denisia Adams


1. Modest and reserved in manner or behavior.
2. Affectedly shy, modest, or reserved.

Which international SA cricketer became the 8th wicketkeeper in the world to score 2000 runs and claim 200 dismissals?

A – Mark Boucher B – A.B de Villiers C –Dave Ricardson
Answer: A – Mark Boucher

DID YOU KNOW (www.didyouknow.org)
More than 100 million people hold hunting licences. Also did you know The first instance of global electronic communications took place in 1871 when news of the Derby winner was telegraphed from London to Calcutta in under 5 minutes.

TIP OF THE DAY (www.wikihow.com)
How to Look and Act Happy when You Don't Feel It
Hiding things in the closet has never been a good method, for any kind of situation. By numbing yourself, or pushing your issues away, things can pile up and only get worse. However, basking in self pity and pondering day in, day out on your troubles can make you feel helpless and depressed.
Do the right thing. If you know your problem is too big to ignore then get up and do something about it. Whether that be seeing a therapist, talking to a friend or family member or undoing a wrong, determine what it is that needs to be done to help heal your negative feelings and get you on your way. It's important to remember that if you don't do anything about it now, it's still going to be hanging over you later. Remember - the only way out is through.
Be positive. Stop that flow of negative thoughts, and you'll be amazed at how much your life will change. Alter the way you see things. See the light in everything, be grateful for all that you have and don't let yourself bask in self pity or resentment or bitterness. Find things to look forward to each day and be thankful for the small stuff - a roof over your head, a nice day, a good friend - anything.
Smile. Stop frowning and being miserable and force yourself to smile. Moping will drag you down, so don't give yourself a chance to get stuck into it. Smile every day, no matter how meaningless or plain stupid it may seem.

Find people to help you feel better. This is most definitely the time to work on your relationships with friends and families - anybody in your life. Strengthen your friendships and work on your social skills. Don't isolate yourself in a time of need - reach out! Talk to people everyday, get some human contact to make you feel better. Even if it takes some forcing, make yourself socialise with the people you care about - and remember that they care about you, too.

Distract yourself. Keep yourself busy. Finish that to do list, set yourself goals to continually work towards. Pick up some new hobbies. Read, write, draw, sing, or play an instrument. Even simple chores like cleaning the house can get your mind off things. Doing productive, useful tasks make you feel like you're not wasting your life but actually achieving something, no matter how small. If you don't feel up to working or can't commit yourself, remember you can still distract yourself - call a friend the moment you feel down, dig out your favourite DVD or go for a walk. Taking your mind off things and giving yourself a "time out" period regularly helps you chill out and get away, as well as keeping you away from sinking into a depression again.

Be your own best friend. Don't be unkind to yourself - reward yourself for your strength and courage instead. After all, you've made it this far, right? You deserve a reward. Treat yourself by splurging out on money, kicking back and relaxing, doing anything you want. Stop any harsh, self destructive thoughts. Tell yourself "I love myself" every day when you look in the mirror, even if you feel like the world is crashing around you. Your mind is your number one coping resource, so look after it well, feed it with information, and of course, give it affection! Hating yourself will get you nowhere, since you're stuck with you for a long time anyway.

Counsellor Lesego Mokone from Ilitha Labantu organisation. Lesego agrees that verbal abuse or what we say is powerful so much so that it causes individuals to jeopardize themselves. They have psychological problems/damage, panic attacks, depression and they need medication just to cope daily. Take someone who is overweight not necessarily obese is told, “You too fat!” .That person then adopts a eating order. An African saying states, “You can never follow back the words you say. The words remains it lives with you forever. Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me? I beg to differ.
We then were joined by Ella Rowan from ERattorneys (www.erattorneys.co.za). She joined us to discuss whether one could sue someone for verbal abuse. According to Ella, one could but there’s a big chance of the case being thrown out. Due to the fact that it would be difficult to prove unless of course you can prove that the individual had caused severe mental problems. She went on to say that there are hardly any cases of people who’ve come forward to sue anyone (husband, wife, parents, boss, etc).

Question? Is this because we’ve succumbed to verbal abuse? Do we accept being discriminated against and disrespected? Is verbal abuse just part of life?

Lastly we spoke to Megan Miller from the Community Intervention Centre. She joined us to give us valuable tips on how to deal with someone verbally abusing you or if you find you have the ugly habit of abusing people with your words.

Mary Crowe
You can change your thinking and thereby change your life. You can do this by deliberately imaging into your subconscious good ideas, positive images, instead of negative ones. You are constantly in a state of becoming. And you become what you think

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